Category Archives: Hilarity

My (affordable, lazy) skincare routine

Posted on by under Health/Beauty, Hilarity

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I am no skincare product pro. I would like to make that very clear before I go on. There are marvelous humans across the gender spectrum out there who know so much more about beauty products, skincare, etc. much more than me.

However, my skincare routine has been finessed after years and years of frustratingly stubborn acne and dryness. I also have eczema on my face in some small patches (I will be doing a post about skincare specifically for those of us with eczema!) so my skin is a delicate flower in the worst way. And, having finally wrestled my way into a routine that works, I wanted to share!

My focus lies on not using a lot of products and keeping my routine efficient and cheap because I am lazy and poor (hey grad school!). I only use three products every single day all over my face- an astringent, micellar water, and sunscreen (all from the drugstore!). I apply Aveeno lotion to special parts of my face that are especially sensitive at night so that my skin can heal.

Again, I will be doing a post about eczema and what works for me, but eczema literally means that your skin cannot retain moisture the way that normal skin does, so it’s vital for me to always be moisturizing the eczema-prone parts of my face (otherwise I get what I kindly refer to as lizard skin). Now! Let’s begin.

Daily routine! Morning: I pour a little bit of Clean and Clear Deep Cleaning Astringent on a cotton pad and apply it all over my face. Not too much because there’s acid in there, guys.

Then, I apply a more liberal amount of Garnier SkinActive Micellar Cleansing Water (the waterproof makeup version). I usually brush my teeth or get dressed so that it has time to be on my face before I apply my sunscreen.

After this (you tired yet?) I apply a liberal amount of Neutrogena Ultra Sheer Dry-Touch SPF 30 sunscreen to my face, neck, and chest. I want to be a nice looking old woman and this is the major step in this plan. Decades down the road I cannot wait to look like a fox because I was a nut about sunscreen! I don’t wear any foundation, so I’m ready to go after this! (Lazy, lazy, lazy.)

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Nighttime: I remove all my makeup every single night before I go to bed. Even after a late night out/alcohol/just tired because of humanity! Because seriously my eyelashes are healthier and longer now, and my skin/every part of my face has looked so much better after I became neurotic about this. My nighttime routine is about the same- astringent and micellar water. I do not moisturize before bedtime, which perhaps is a really bad thing (I don’t wear sunscreen at night, and I haven’t found a plain moisturizer I like to wear overnight), but I do use Aveeno sensitive skin lotion/baby lotions for the sensitive (lizard skin) parts of my face.

Bi-weekly and weekly products: 

I use my Mario Badescu Glycolic Foaming Cleanser about 2/3 times a week in the shower. I don’t use anything else in the shower anymore, and this stuff has really made a difference in the evenness of my skin! It can be super drying, though, so if you have sensitive skin don’t go overboard (again, acid y’all). I skip using my astringent at nighttime if I use it that day. A little bottle of this lasts me several months and it’s $16, which is pretty reasonable.

Weekly/Every other week: I use the Mario Badescu Silver Powder. It only has 3 ingredients and is super easy to use- you get a cotton pad or ball damp and dip it into the powder and apply the mask-like mixture to your T-zone. Do be warned: As it dries, it powders off your face, so for the 10 minutes you leave it on I would be somewhere you don’t mind snowing Silver Powder everywhere. Is it a bit weird? Yes. Does it help for pores/blackheads? I think so! It’s also affordable, because you don’t use a lot and at $12 a jar it goes a looonnnggg way.

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There you have it! My affordable, minimal, and easy to use skincare routine. I do want to find a retinol to incorporate into this formula but honest to god since moving to Canada I balk at all the prices for skincare products. (I bring back everything from Target or Ulta when I go home- no way am I paying ridiculous prices plus taxes here!) Until I make a trip to the States again and can get my hands on (bless you Montana!) some tax-free goods I’m sticking with this.

This is my personal beauty regimen, one developed over years of trial and error like most of us. Thank goodness for beauty bloggers who have helped guide me over the years (shoutout to Arabelle Sicardi, that marvelous human!).

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Hannibal: New Favorite Show, with recaps

Posted on by under Favorite things, Hilarity

hannibal_1 hannibal_killedmydad hannibal_stubble hannibal_awkwardA wonderful blog, Fugivity, makes re-caps of Hannibal episodes with the most awkward/greatest text. I am in love with this show, for many reasons.

1. Mads Mikkelsen/Hugh Dancy are great together

2. All the other casting is superb

3. It’s beautifully shot (Same guy who did Pushing Daisies, another of my favorites)

4. The dialogue is psychological and awesome

5. It’s NBC’s first truly awesome show they’ve put out there in awhile. Way to take a risk, NBC! DO NOT CANCEL THIS GLORIOUS SHOW!

All images are from Fugivity. 

 

A Fair Day, You Might Say!

Posted on by under Adventures, Americana, Cameras, College, Exploring, Favorite things, Hilarity, Montana, Photography, Small Town Things

Chelsea and I parked 400 meters from the fair, walked down to the crowded parking lot, and into the most chaotic and entertaining venue here in Montana: the county fair.

Now, if you live somewhere rural, you know the fair: it’s a rodeo combined with a bunch of outdated, unsafe, and really awesome amusement rides. Lots of cranky adults, smoking carnival employees, and dirty children wait in line for food, rides, and games that cheat you out of money swirl around you while you wonder whether to buy 10 or 20 tickets. Roaming groups of teenagers stalk the area, with hungry looks in their eyes, while the best characters in town seemingly come out of the cracks- it’s a literal human zoo.

After Chelsea and I pooled our limited (read: pathetic) amount of cash, we had enough for 10 tickets each. After quickly doing some elementary arithmetic, we devised our plan: Go on the Yo-yo, a dilapidated swing ride, for 3 tickets, then the Typhoon, the terrifying and somewhat shaky ride for 4, and end with the classic Ferris Wheel. BOOM MATH!

In between, we ate the always healthy funnel cakes and caramel apples, went into the farm buildings and petted lambs, laughed at very fluffy chickens, ooed and aahed at the lop eared rabbits and stared at the alien looking earless goats that I definitely want to put as props in a sci-fi film if I ever decide to make a film.

The last ride, the Ferris Wheel, had the longest wait. Just as we were about to get on, a little boy who didn’t have anybody to ride with joined us- a precocious 7 year old named Ashton who had a remarkable vocabulary and told us that if the Ferris Wheel broke down he was a good climber and would save us. His cranky grandmother smoked a cigarette and held a blow-up hammer that he’d won while he waved at her with Chelsea and I.

After the Ferris Wheel we went home, with our stomachs full of junk and our eyes full of neon, the wind blowing in our hair and the cops at the exit, telling us where to cross the street.

I used my crappy Minolta Talk-O-Matic the entire time- it can take a beating. The pictures turned out better than I thought they would! Enjoy!

If only you’d been there.

Posted on by under Americana, College, Hilarity, Montana, Photography

Montana weather is notoriously fickle. One moment the sun is shining, the next it’s raining, then it’s hailing, or sometimes Nature even skips the rain and hail and just blizzards out of nowhere.

Well, that’s what happened. I drove home Sunday afternoon into a clear Bozeman. I woke up to a good 8 inches of snow, and there were 4 more inches on top of that by noon. WHAT?! Then, by 3, it got up to about 40 degrees and began melting. Tuesday and Wednesday were warm, about 50 and 60 degrees, respectively, and the snow created huge mud puddles and quagmires everywhere! By Thursday Meghan and I went downtown and got warm enough to stop in the Chocolate Moose (pun, get it?) for a root beer float and a chocolate milkshake.

While we were sipping the refreshments, I was waving my camera around, and this guy who looks rather vagrant-y stops, stands, and says, “Hey, did you take my picture?”

I immediately tell him no, but then he repeats himself- “Hey, would you take my picture?”

Ohhhh, that’s what he was asking. He introduces himself as “Sam, the most produced songwriter in the world!”

I say, “Sure!”, set the focus, and tell him, “One, two…”

“ORGASM!” Sam says as the shutter clicks. Then, Sam the Most Produced Songwriter in the World walks off into the sunny Bozeman midday.

Sadly, his photograph didn’t turn out…it was the end of the roll. 😦

Anyway, here are the photographs from this last week. Just living the dream- school, walks, sunshine, snow, blizzards, and surprises.

The ridiculousness of it all.

Posted on by under Hilarity

The internet is a glorious place.

Also, this is a majorly unsourced post. I saved most of these ages ago on my computer, mostly via Tumblr. I hate posting things without a legitimate source, sorry guys.

Anyway, as follows:

1. My future pet.

2. A map of Europe from a 1959 National Geographic, scanned by me.

3. An illustration by Quentin Blake for Roald Dahl’s The Twits

4. What my mother would refer to as a “man of promise”. Clearly.

5. I hate cats, normally, but seriously best thing ever.

James Gillray: Talented cartoonist with razor sharp wit.

Posted on by under Art History, Badasses of Art, Favorite things, Hilarity, History

I love old engravings, prints, and paintings.

I also love humor.

So, the summation of these two would be the incredibly detailed and hilarious etchings and cartoons by none other than James Gillray.

As a side note, I pray that I never get gout, as the bottom etching makes it look most unfortunate to have a mustachio-ed beast attached to ones foot.

 

 

Pingu in Serbian

Posted on by under Hilarity, Inspiration

Alright, so this is incomprehensible, unless you DO happen to speak Serbian or Croatian. I’m about 90% sure this is Serbian- my friend picked it up whilst bungling around in Eastern Europe before heading to India for the summer.

Anyway, Pingu is my FAVORITE stop-motion claymation creature! He’s Swiss, he spouts gibberish, and he’s so adorable!

I must say, though, that without being able to read the text the pictures are hilarious. Hil. Ar. Ious. Pingu’s face? I mean, I giggled as I scanned these in my school library-  nobody understood what that weird girl with the children’s book was laughing at.

Wisdom from “The Simpsons”

Posted on by under College, Favorite things, Hilarity

(This one above feels especially relevant sometimes!)

Ridiculous, satirical, hysterical, and relevant. That is how I would describe “The Simpsons”. Not only one of TV’s longest running shows, but also one of my favorites. Of course, one has to be in a “Simpson”-y mood sometimes- Homer is not for everybody, but somehow through the last few years I have saved quite a few screen caps from episodes.

I apologize for not knowing what wonderful soul screen-capped these, so sourcing is nil. If you know, please don’t hesitate to inform me! Knowledge is power, and I feel terrible for unwittingly saving them sans-source.

The Return of The Office.

Posted on by under Americana, Favorite things, Hilarity, The Office

The Office was  game changer when it began way back when. Steve Carell was fatter, and he was balding. The staff of The Office changed after it took a “break” (cancelled) and everybody came back with more money thanks to Steve Carell’s hit The 40 Year Old Virgin. Everybody got more attractive as the seasons went on, but it remained the quirky, weird show with awkward, cringe-worthy humor, and a documentary style that endeared audiences. We have all seen shows that use the same awkward humor now to highlight human emotions and situations…but The Office is the original, and it is the best.

I started watching The Office when I was in 7th grade…I remember specifically being booted out of the room during the 2nd episode of the second season when Dwight asks Toby about clitorises and female sex organs; the rents weren’t having my young (and already tarnished) ears hearing this. Last year a small group of die-hard Office fans and myself began The Finer Things Club at my school- we watched The Office, ate food, and discussed the show and had Christmas events. It even got school government approval. So, we were OFFICIALLY that Weird Club for Weird Things.

Last season, Steve Carell announced he was leaving after seven seasons on the best show to hit television since Friends. Tonight Season Eight begins without Michael Scott. It’s uncertain and nail-biting. I am in mourning for Michael Gary Scott and I’m also extremely nervous for tonight.

Hark a Vagrant Goodness

Posted on by under Hilarity, History

I am fairly sure that I have already boasted heavily about Hark a Vagrant once or twice.

I can’t help it, so here goes Gush Session Number Two

Kate Beaton is a hilarious Canadian comic artist who is HISTORICALLY ACCURATE (mostly), hilarious, and is so skilled with words and characters. Who else could make one feel sympathy for poor Napoleon while Josephine is attacked by a suitor on the couch? Who else could make French Versailles prostitution involve little French dogs, or have Tesla’s inventions ruined by tossed bloomers?

Only the brilliant Kate Beaton.

If you haven’t already, check out her comic website, Hark a Vagrant